Alka Dwivedi

Online Match-Making

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Alka

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I was reading Harvard Business School Working Knowledge Newsletter. It states that Jeana H. Frost, Michael I. Norton and Dan Ariely are taking an academic look at online dating and how it can be improved. They have created virtual dates. Using virtual dates the couple can communicate in real time. Couples can use colors, words and images while chatting. The virtual date will give a clearer idea of the person and it would be easy for online users to decide whether to take the relationship any further or not. The objective behind creation of virtual date is to eliminate the current dating sites’ shortcomings. The researcher Jeana H. Frost states “The current model is artificial and static, and far removed from everyday social interaction.â€?

The trios’ research findings say, when people actually meet face to face, their expectations just bite the dust. When a couple is conversing online, the chemistry seems to be perfect. Right questions are asked and more than perfect answers are given. One can have a faultless relationship in a cyber world. By using virtual dates, people would be able to filter non interesting dates easily.

Here, my idea is not to write about technological implications of this research on relationships. I wonder, how fervently one human being wants to connect with another. The urge, not to stay lonely is incredibly strong. No denying the fact that man is a social animal. And good dating sites are minting money exploiting this human emotion. But does every human want to be understood and be connected to another soul? Do we really want a soul-mate? Or our first priority is social acceptability? Can we flaunt our mate in front of other or not? For exhibiting the mates, they have to be presentable, financially flourishing with a social standing and have everything that is “in thing.� So when we come across with online date in three dimensions, which emotion is dominating us? Our own or social acceptability?

Comments

4 responses to “Online Match-Making”

  1. prancer Avatar
    prancer

    yes absolutely right…the net provides and undue advantage in the form of a garb which reality doesn’t…people do get misled many a time…expectations come crashing down eventually…probably a more interactive media catering to audio n video may prove as a window but even then nothing can come par with reality as such…good food for thought from you as always 🙂

  2. Sudipta Chatterjee Avatar
    Sudipta Chatterjee

    Ahh… so to the point again! But I guess there is more to an online dating service that makes the other person (potential mate?) seem so perfect: For one, you can think before you type; and more importantly, the body language and the subtle messages do not come into the picture. So the image of the person at the other end of the line is more what you dream of (or maybe like to think), than what reality may actually throw at you. Good post… keep them coming!

  3. Mallik Avatar
    Mallik

    Perhaps carl jung can throw some light on it…
    As far as i see it its a mix of all the three you said, acting dynamically.

    Once it was said in discovery channel that the basic tendency of any human being is to extend his DNA pool, to that extent, he would need to survive and hence seek acceptable, seek partners to extend progeny. The male spiecies by nature of the reproductive system need to mate with as many, and the female need to chose the most successful one. and they say, this theory perhaps explains the social and family choices…

    funny…this world never stops to amuse me….

  4. Alka Avatar
    Alka

    Prancer, as you have said,”nothing can come par with reality as such.” Its 100% true.

    Sudipta, net really gives ample time to think and react. That’s why e-mail friendships look so perfect. 🙂 How’s life at a totally new place? What about your cooking? Can we get an update on it in your upcoming posts? 🙂

    Mallik, I think, I have seen this programme too. And most of the people still behaves like cave dwelling ancestors. 🙂 But reality is, apart from reproducing, humans need other things too. If the partner is not understanding, the spark will die down from the relationship. That’s why even successful males don’t have a very happy partners.

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